The Itis. And Gonorrehea Girl... Part 11

Goodness gracious... I ate way too much food this turkey day. I ate so much I could barely sit up. Strangley enough though, none of it was turkey... go figure. Antyways, back to the story:

Ok, so yeah. I killed Stewart's girl. But he fucked up mine. And don't judge me, you haven't heard my side of the story yet...

I was just practicing my new powers. I decided that I would practice running through the walls in the house. I had to get used to my powers, right? Lets just say it wasn't easy. After running fullspeed into the wall a couple times, I finally managed to do pretty good with the morphing through stuff deal. Then I decided for fun I would run through Stewart's room and freak him out by yelling in his ear while I was running through. Unfortunately, I wasn't so good at talking while still in phantom mode. I materialized inside of his girl, and... it was messy...

So Stewart screams something about loving her (he really falls in love way too easily. he knows very little about one night stands) and runs out telling me he'll kill me. So anyway, I've still got an advantage on him: he doesn't know I've got powers. So I follow him out for some intense recon. I found out two things: 1) she's gotta be some twisted version of a doppelganger 'cause she is as close to a female version of Stewart as you can get, and 2) Stewart can raise people from the dead.

That brings me to today. I'm testing out my other powers. I went to the shiftiest part of town (which admittedly isn't very shifty, but come on give me a break) and found a bar. I walked in and sat in one of the stools. The bartender turned my way.

"Aren't you a little young to be here?"

"Nah. Age is just a number. It has nothing to do with maturity."

"Oh really?"

"Really."

"So are you mature enough for me?"

"Hmmm..." I sized her up. Not bad. But she's pretty fucking easy though... May have gonorrhea... Oh yeah, I'll regenerate though. Let the good times roll. "Hell, yeah."

"You're talkin alittle too long to my girl, son. I suggest you leave."

I turn around to this 7 foot tall monster of a guy staring at me. Today wont be boring after all.

"I'm guessing you're the toughest muthafucka in here?"

"That'd be me, yeah."

"And what if I don't leave? What if instead I fuck your girl right there on the bar. Then what?"

He punched me so hard it would've snapped my neck just a week ago. But not now. I turn back to him.

"Uh-uh-uh." (I shake my finger at him for dramatic effect)

Then he swings again. I grab his hand, and use it to sling him through the window. He's out cold.

"I'll pay for that sweetheart, but first..." (I unzip my pants. hehe... secret weapon.)

Good times...

Later on I call up Mike.

"What do you want?"

"Stewart's ghost can resurrect people."

"..."

"What? Is that as bad as I thought it was?"

"Yes it is. Stewart is the one person in the world who may empower the demon enough to defeat me."

"Pssh. Bullshit. I could kick Stewart and his demon friend's ass."

"You'd think that wouldn't you?"

"Yep. I would. OH! Watch this!"

I bit my bicep off and ate it.

"Cool right? I learned that one from reading a wolverine comic. Now I'll never go hungry."

"Now I'm just going to leave... you enjoy that..."

I spit it back out after he left. Biceps are nasty. Maybe I should carry around some honey mustard and hot sauce just in case I ever have to do that again. You know, for flavor.

Dr. Orange

Jesus Christ Thou Art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name, shut the fuck up. ... Part 10

That was a good lunch. I ate a shit ton. Too much. Oh well, with my already quick metabolism and the added support of my ghost man, I'll be fine.

I slipped out and stuck Alex with the check.

God damn.

I was walking down the street hoping to find a place to relax and talk to ghost man. I found a nice alley, sat down and started talking.

"So, tell me the whole story."

No.

"Okay... tell me what you can."

Well, I'm not a ghost, per se, I'm more of a demon. A fallen angel actually. I was one of the angels that revolted against God because I hated how the human race was treated better than I was.

"Oh fuck..."

What?

"That means the catholics are right."

Well, I didn't fare too well and I was caught by an angel, Michael. He was forbidden to kill me, but instead place me inside confinement in that location. Then God told him that if I left then he could kill me.

"Why'd you leave inside me though?"

You're special. With you, I can beat Michael. You're...

Then a girl walked up, and inquired, "Why are you talking to yourself?"

I decided to go for the truth, "I'm talking to a demon-ghost that possessed me when I went into a haunted house in England and have now gotten myself caught up in an ancient battle between him and the archangel Michael."

"Cool.. My name's Mary."

Heh, kind of funny there.

"I'm Stewart. I haven't been here long. By here I mean Venice, not in the alley, well, not in the alley long either."

"Stop, its okay, where are you staying?"

"Oh, we got a penthouse, want to come see it?"

Oh sweet shit, are we going to get laid?

"Yeah! I'd love to."

We started walking towards the hotel and she and I kept talking.

"What's his name?"

"I don't know... I have just been calling him ghost dude."

"He needs a name, an evil sounding name, like Serracio, or Ser for short?"

"You good with that dude?"

Yeah, that sounds okay.

When we got to the hotel no one was in the room. We went into the room I had been sleeping in and watched TV, talked, and then started making out. We passed out together on the bed.

I was awakened by a loud banging sound. Zach stood over the foot of our bed and blood was everywhere.

"SHIT!! I thought that would work!!" He was screaming. Mary was dead.

"What the fuck dude?" I was livid, "You killed her, I think I was in love with her! I'm going to fucking kill you!"

No, don't fight right now, I can bring her back, just take her body and run.

And so I did. I took her body back to the alley where we met, and we revived her. I explained what was going on and that I was going to send her some place safe, but she wouldn't, she said she was going to stay with me. She said she wants to help me train and get better. Keep me on track. We left Venice. We went to Russia. I know Alex will find me there when he splits off from Zach, and it is the only option I have right now. We can hunt for food and we will be fine.

"Wait, so he is a fallen angel?"

"Yeah."

"Fuck..."

"What?"

"That means the Catholics are right..." She said, and then we laughed.

Blackened Rice and Late Night Movies ... Part 9

"Did you get paid yet?"
"Yea, I get half upfront."
"Awesome, Now we dine !"
"... IN HELL!!!!"
"... O.K. nice 300 reference but bit creepy especially with the whole spirit thing inside you buddy"

Of course Stewart found the greasiest food around and I just waited for him eating my Italian pizza. Zac has diappeared by this point. I think he's with that screaming chick, I don't even know her name ... did he mention it. I don't remember him mentioning it, I wonder if she's mentally sound yet?
...
and now Stewart is gone.

I met up with Zac later at the apartment. The screaming chick was in the kitchen and as I could smell it, burning something. I ignored her attempts and got a small collection of fruit & fell on the couch with Zac. He was watching yet another rerun of Ironman.

"Really man?!"
"I'm preparing, I need to know how to make decisions like a super hero, especially with my new powers and all."
" Wait a second ... YOU now have powers as well?! and you're watching Ironman of ALL movies for your guidance?!"
"No .... I just wanted to watch it again."
"So what's your plan?"
"Don't have one yet."
"Is it going to be bloody?"
"Don't know yet."
"Wow, well I don't really have anything to do now, I'm gonna go chill at the internet cafe, I hear they have a Modern Warfare lan party going like 24/7."
"Wait, I need help man, I don't know what to do."
"That dinner she is cooking will give you all the guidance you need."
"Aw shit!!! Is that fire ?!"
"I'll let you take care of that."

I spent the rest of the night playing MW with a bunch of Italians and my lack of knowledge of Italian made it a very interesting night.

When I got back in the morning the place was empty and smelled like smoke. What the hell with everyone getting up early as shit the past few days? fucking hell. Ironman was still on paused on the T.V.

I turned to MTV and passed out on the smoke infested couch.

Again? ... Part 8

"The hell?"

Why is it that things had to happen with me around? Why couldn't things just wait until after I left. 300 people died tonight. But I didn't! Hell yeah! Survival Five!

So the guy's name is Michael. I'm not sure about this. According to Stewart's ghost thing he's gonna try to kill us. But you know what, I think Micheal just wants to kill him. Anyway me and Mike (He lets me call him that... we're buds) had a little conversation...

Me - "Oh shit!"

Mike - "I am Michael. I am here to exterminate the abomination thats has escaped its prison. Is it true that you know of this demon?"

Me - "...Yeah, I know about him. As a matter of fact I know him. He's possessed my friend and I'm trying to figure out how to kill it. I'm guessing you know how?"

Mike - "Yes. I do. I am the how. Where is he now?"

Me - "Ah... can you kill him without killing my friend?"

Mike - "Your friend has been possessed. A demon can only possess a body is the soul is willing. He has made his decision."

Me - "He's not really bad at heart... he just made a bad decision. I mean, who wouldn't want super powers? I want super powers. You've GOT super powers, Mike. (You don't mind me calling you Mike do you?)"

Mike - "Hmmm... I see your point. There is a way. There is always one person that a demon cannot physically harm. This person may go insane, but he/she holds the power to defeat the demon without killing its host. (And yes, you can call me Mike.)"

That crazy bit--I mean Maria - "AAAAAAAGH!"

Me - "That's her right there Mikey."

Mike - "Well you have to help get her sanity back. It will be a hard task. In the meantime, I will bestow you with these 'super powers' you want so dearly. Which powers do you choose?"

Me - "Heheheh. I want to be able to turn invisible and morph through stuff. I want to be able to regenerate my body, even from mortal wounds. I wanna be 30 men strong like Beowulf... And I wanna be able to contact you at all times."

Mike - "Very well."

Me - "Yeah. By the way you might wanna leave now. My friend is gonna be here anytime soon. I don't want you going back on your word and killing him. Peace, Mike."

Great. I've got powers. Now I need a costume. That can be arranged. Anyway, Its time to put on a front for Stewart's ghosts g. I'll clue Alex in later on though.

Next day. Stewart was eyeing my girl. I didn't like her at first, but now I'm jealous. Ok, maybe I can get her back to sanity, but until then I gotta keep an eye on her. Stewart better not try anything. I'll bust my new invisible deadpool shadow cat powers on him.

Heheh

No "the hell?" ending this time. Pretty nice.

Ooh a piece of candy.. Ooh a piece of candy.. OH FUCK BLOODY ROOM! ... Part 7

Alex got dressed to go to Zach's thing that night, while I was discussing with my little spirit thingy about how kick ass I wanted to look.

Once we finally decided we headed out of the hotel.

"So, where is this thing again?" I asked, knowing my directional sense sucks gigantic donkey balls.

"Not too far from here. How was you're other-self-pleasure?" Alex was grinning.

"Oh shit.. it was... well.... fucking incredible. I came spirit. Think about that shit."

"And all of a sudden I regretted asking."

I started laughing.

"By the way man, we need to chill with the mind control tonight, okay? I dont want any more days like today."

"He doesn't get any more girls, does he?" I asked my spirit thingy.

No and we need to give me a name.

"What was your name before death?"

No name, I wasn't ever really alive. I am a demon. I just got locked inside that room until the.... nevermind.

"No, what??"

Nothing, shut the fuck up.

"Alex, you got any idea?"

"None whatsoever man."

We finally got to the club. The crazy chick from this morning was at the door. She saw me and I smiled at her and flared my eyes a little, she was kinda cute and I do like them crazy.

She screamed and ran away.

Damn. That was weird.

We walked into the club and saw bloodshed.

"What the fuck dude? I thought you hadn't been here?"

"I haven't, Alex, we cleaned and jerked off the whole time you were gone."

"Wait, shit... Zach..."

We went to the turntables up at the front, where Zac was hiding underneath.

"Zach, what did this?"

"I don't know, the bouncer had just told me there were 300 people in the club and that we hit the limit for the fire department."

"Wait," I stopped him "300? 300 people? dead?"

"Thats what it looks like. The bouncer turned around, then time froze, and everyone exploded around me while a voice was asking me about your ghost."

Did he say his name?

Zach thought for a minute, "Ma...Martin? Marvin? Michelle?"

MICHAEL.

"Yeah, that was it."

Guys, we're in some deep shit. He is going to kill us.

"Oh shit." Alex was standing there. I think he was thinking of pancakes.

"Ok, lets clean this up man."

He did his clean thing and we left the club and went to the bar.

"So," Zach turns to me at the bar, "I have to know, he is morphing matter into your clothes and stuff right?"

"Yeah"

"So, if he weren't there right now, you would be naked."

"That is indeed true, I would be without clothing."

"That doesn't bug you?"

"Well I can't feel his clothes, so its very breezy and nice, but at the same time warm."

"Thats fucked up."

Демон Британий ... Part 6

I figured the Roman library might have something of some use on this stupid spirit even just to understand what he just got himself into.

Zac was already there to my surprise, mostly because I didn't figure he would actually go to a library. Him and all his new age bullshit, I figured he'd probably would just use the internet.

I join him at his table and he has A FUCKING PICTURE BOOK ..... A PICTURE BOOK ... maybe he just isn't taking it too seriously.

"I thought you got rid of her mate?!"
"I did, I gave her my last 20 too man"
"... so she followed your ass, dude you gotta watch out for that shit, you know 'When in Rome ... etc'"
"What is with you and that damn phrase dude"
"I don't know, I like it, has a ring to it dont you think?"
"Yea whatever, by the way what the hell does this book say?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!" ... oh shit, and the migrane returns.

" ... that isn't even Russian man, Fuck, your X-ed out friend is here, I'll see you later, better pray Stewart gets his shit together and cleans that damn place or we in some deep shit, laters"
"Come on man, don't leave me with this crazy bitch!"
"No can do mate, that is your own little endeavor, see ya"

It is too easy to find a pub in Italy, this isn't doing any good for me but hey what the hell might as well enjoy the time until we get into some major shit for that group of chicks that suddenly went "missing" a few hours ago or however long it has been.

Shots in the afternoon sounds pretty good right now.

The place is surprisingly spotless when I return.

"What the hell mate, I know you're not THAT diligent"
"It's the spirit man, it just made it all go away *snaps* just like that"
".... I need a drink.... again"
"Lend an ear to your friend, he does speak he truth"
"Soooo, hows the whole body experience treating you?"
"It is quite different, it has definitely been many a moon since the last time I did occupy a physical body of a human. I had some enjoyment with some household appliances in the store they built in the house. All those poor coffee pots and blackened bagels. I remember making a little statue from the books one night. Everybody had a blast with that, of course I ended up killing the guy who took it down. That was frowned upon."
"Sounds like you are going to fit quite nicely into this little group."
"It is kind of nice to be welcomed somewhere although your little music friend is trying to find a way to get rid of me and I am not enjoying that much. It is slightly insulting although it isn't like people haven't been trying to get rid of me for a long time."
"That is quite understandable and you're quite welcome, especially if you clean up the mess *chuckle* but anyways can I get my friend back we have some partying to get to?"
"In a little bit, I have some business to take care of first .. "
"... that is just a tad bit suspicious there"
"As i have observed your generation puts it as 'stroking the pole' as you see I haven't had the experience in awhile so if you will excuse me I will have your friend back in a minute or a few"
"...."
"...."
"OKEY .... just wash up and get him in the kitchen afterwards"

I wonder whatever happened to that chick and Zac .... wait .... where's my wallet.

"Hey buddy" *waves*
"oh hi there. seen my wallet?"
"Aren't those the new pants or something"
".... Oh "
"Come on where's Zac, doesn't he have a gig tonight?"

Of course....

Of course I'm in the middle of the title. I just realized it changed from "The Russian and the Green Guy" up there to including Dr. Orange. I'm sandwiched.

Well... for all you well to do people out there, here is something random, a small game.

Try to say, with a very serious face, these phrases:

"The environment (long pause) is no laughing matter."

"I'm sorry sir, but you have a lethal disease (long pause) from your penis."

and also I'd like for you to think to yourself what word you would like me to use instead of cursing from now on, go on, pick one and let me know.

I won't use it on here, that'd be retarded, but I will record the best quotes of the day that come out of me substituting it instead of cursing, so yeah...fuckers.

Maybe lifelong masturbation wasn't such a bad idea...

There ain't no such thing as free titties.

Whether you are paying in money or paying by listening to their problems.

Both of those are quotes, see if you can figure out what from.


This has been the first Green Guy post that wasn't a story addition in a while,

Here's the Green Guy, hoping you're keeping it real because he sure as hell isn't.

Italy is nice. But the people aren't. Part 5

Where was I... oh yeah:

"The hell?"

Yeah. I got rid of that crazy bitch. Well she was a crazy bitch, so don't judge my choice of words. Anyway, I went back up to the apartment and catch the tail end of Stewart and Alex's conversation...

Alex - "...tell me you didn't just waste a good beer."

Stewart - "No... It was an empty one."

Ha. Priceless.They're some fucking idiots.

Alex - "Damn straight. Now, what's going on?"

Stewart - "I don't know. I really don't. I know I was using him to do some small parlor tricks, then I moved on to doing some minor mind control and stuff, the small kind works real well on drugged out bitches. I got Zac's girl to leave with him, and then I got the group of girls that you and I brought back."

I was wondering what her problem was... she seemed a little braindead...

Stewart - "He has an advantage. He can hear my thoughts, and yet I can't hear his. But Alex, I like this power. I love it actually."

That's all I needed to hear. I went back down the elevator. Hopefully that thing doesn't know I was there. But who am I kidding? He's a thing. Things always know. Back to what my original plan was: figure out how to fucking kill that ghost thing. Like all the old people say, knowledge is power. To the library. I'm sure there's some old ass library in Rome that has some info on this thing.

At the library I dig up the oldest book i can find about ghosts. Then I put it back down. Then I find the newest book with pictures.

It's actually a good book. I understand most of it... but some shit was in Russian. WTF? Book in Rome. If anything I would expect fucking Italian but Russian? If Alex walks through the door I swear... Alex just walked through the door. Wow. I would've did this shit on the Internet if I knew it was gonna be this easy. Good he see's me. I don't know if Italians are as bitchy about being quiet in libraries as Americans, but at this point I don't wanna yell across the room find out.

"Yo Alex. I don't know about you, but I think we need to do something about this ghost thing. So I came to do research--"

"And you got the picture book. Thats typical Zac."

"Don't judge me. And this isn't a picture book... It's a very informative and expertly written book that happens to have pictures in it."

"...Uh huh, yeah."

"Anyway, I was looking at this particular picture. Figure 18.2. Right there. Page 420. Yeah. Right there. Russian, right? What does that shit say?"

He takes a quick second. And yes it was a quick second. You know, as opposed to the long ones. Anyway, he's about to translate and then...

That same damn crazy bitch I thought I got rid of - "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!"

That bitch followed me? And that was my last 20 too. Damn it. Guess she's gonna be in this for the long haul, so to all you who don't know, her name is Maria, i think... It sounded like she said "Mario" but I think that was because she was so fucked up.

She runs towards me, tackles me, almost squeezes the fucking life out of me. Holding on for dear life. As if my skinny ass could protect her from a muthafuckin' ghost.

Anyways, it takes all my breath, but I manage to say it:

"The hell?"

Dr. Orange

Don't fuck with a guy who can't spell rifle.... Part 4

Alex left. i was sitting there naked in a bloody bathtub. Jesus. What the hell happened.

I happened. I do come at a cost. I need sustenance just like you do. Did you think i would come free? I have a will of my own, and with that comes my own plans.

I couldn't move. I just drank what was left of the beer and sat there.

"Jesus fucking christ man." Zac saw what was in the room and ran out again.

I heard Alex trying to calm Zac down.

"Zac is taking that crazy bitch down the street and giving her a twenty. I need you to tell me what all happened, start the water, wash off a bit and lets try and get this place cleaned up... first, here, have another beer." Alex was walking in.

He sat on the sink after handing me another beer.

"No, you can't keep solving our problems with beer." I yelled back at him, then I threw the empty bottle against the wall.

"For the love of god tell me you didn't just waste a good beer."

"No... it was an empty one."

"Damn straight. Now, what's going on?"

"I don't know. I really don't. I know I was using him to do some small parlor tricks, then I moved on to doing some minor mind control and stuff, the small kind works real well on drugged out bitches. I got Zac's girl to leave with him, and then I got the group of girls that you and I brought back."

"Wait, group??"

"Yeah, why?"

"Zac's girl was the only one I saw this morning."

"Oh shit...."

"Yeah, oh shit."

"Um... any bodies?"

"No. Just blood."

I drained the bathtub and toweled off.

"He has an advantage. He can hear my thoughts, and yet I can't hear his. But Alex, I like this power. I love it actually."

"Stewart, you're fucking with some fucked up shit and you need to stop and get him out of you."

"Ew, ha, and I don't want to. It feels good. You go somewhere, I'll take care of the cleaning."

Alex shook his head, I finished my beer and got dressed. Alex left the hotel room, I don't know where he went.

You know he went to research. Research me, and why I picked you.

"Why did you pick me?"

You are special.

"Special how?"

Son of someone very special.

"My dad's a lawyer."

Someone else very special. All will be revealed in time. We need to clean.

"Don't suppose you can help me clean up can you?"

Ha.

He then zapped it. Clean. The whole damn room. The whole damn penthouse.

It's Funking Epic!

So... It's monday again. But you know what. I've got a lack of stuff that grinds my gears. I think I just needed a couple weeks to vent, you know, make my feelings known to the world. Now I feel great, thanks to our ever/never-present internet audience. Thanks a bunch guys. I'm a much happier person now.

With that note, I'm posting this so the Green Guy can post the next installment to the story. Damn, this thing is getting pretty juicy. Mine sucked pretty bad, but The Russian overkilled that shit. His post is "Funking Epic" as a mistyped him a few minutes ago on a facebook message. I think I'll start saying funk more often.

Dr. Orange

When in Rome ... Part 3

I was awoken by the same scream that awoke Zac. The late night took its toll and it took me awhile to come to my senses and get out of the hazyness of waking up before you were meant to. I am slightly confused by the place I wake up at first and then remember the penthouse we rented with Zac's pay from last night. I make up way to the bathroom.

Thoroughly shocked by the presence of blood all over the left side of my body I quickly come to my senses and stumble out of the bathroom in search of answers.

I don't exactly remember if i brought a girl back or not but it was safe to assume that I did so I was left severely confused.

I see Zac went back to sleep on halfway falling off the couch he passed out on, man I wish I could sleep like that and FUCK YOU Stewart for whatever you did to that poor chick. You and that fucking spirit. I think Zac's planning something but doesn't want to mention anything about it.

I find myself at the entrance to Stewart's room .... all the furniture is pushed up against the walls with the rug left in the middle of the floor. Either Stewart got extremely kinky after that spirit did whatever it did or he just did something he wouldn't do on a regular basis, which actually might explain the blood.

After exploring the room and finding the rug making disgusting squishy noises and that the blood red rug is blood red for a reason, I find Stewart naked in the bathtub the bathroom is something you see from a horror film. I wake Stewart up hand him one of the local beers that I just realized I was carrying, sit on the bloody john.

"You do realize that we need to leave soon, you know how much they'll charge if they see this fucking mess man?!"

He wasn't happy to be awoken that early and just grumbles while drinking his beer at which time I hear another scream.

Close to the entrance door this time. As it turns out the chick Zac managed to bring in here before she passed out with him, on her extasy high, getting Zac nowhere yet again. Im sorry little dude maybe the next gig. He always manages to find the drugged up ones.

The blood is starting crust so I make my way to the shower, after I am cleaned, I start to ponder the fact why I had blood all over me.

Did I just help my best friend who is currently possesed by some maniacal spirit from a British haunted house murder a couple of hot chicks from Italy in my drunken stupor ..... am I that fucking stupid when drunk or was she that bad of a lay. Damn my dilemma for the day has come to me this early in .... it is going to be a LONG day.

Fuck I need to get that chick to calm down I think she's about to give me a headache.

“I’d run over that guy. I don’t know him, but he just looks like a douchebag.” ... Part 2

A quote from the hilarious Green Guy. Don’t make him angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry. He’ll run over your ass.

Antyways… Apparently, I’m supposed to be putting the next addition to the story so here goes…

“The hell?”

Those were the first words that came out of my mouth when I saw what had happened to Stewart. The next thing was a “Oh shit!” and the next was “What the fuck was that?!” I tend to curse a lot when shit like that happens. I’m trying to quit though. I did it again didn’t I?

Anyway, Stewart had apparently had an encounter with the ghost of the place, and instead of dying like everyone else he made friends. How sweet. I don’t like the ghost, mostly because I’m pretty sure it doesn’t like me. I’m gonna figure out how to kill that thing, but until then I’m gonna play it cool. I mean seriously, Stewart can’t really trust that thing can he? He’s read Spiderman, hasn’t he?

On the road again.

I decide that since we were in Europe we should go to Italy. When we get there I want try to put my expertise to practice in a foreign country. Finding somewhere to DJ at isn’t too hard. A day after I got there someone called about an ad I had put up the day before and said they’d pay me $50 an hour to DJ at a party that night. Not a lot, but I’m just doing it for the experience. The money isn’t important.

We get there, I set up, the party starts. Crazy. I had fun. I’m pretty sure Stewart and Alex did too. Well, I know Stewart did… He was doing some pretty weird stuff with that ghost/symbiote thing of his. Does that thing have some kind of affect on the weak-minded or something? I’ve never seen that many women crowded around a guy… Damn Zac. Jealous much? Afterwards… well lets just say the three of us had a great time that night, and we’ll leave it at that.

I’m screaming like a little girl. No wait, that’s not me. That is a girl. I’m awakened very early in the morning by someone else’s nightmare.

“Hey. Get up.”

At this point I’m thinking that I must’ve picked up the craziest girl in the club, but me being the sucker I am, I decided not to make a big deal out of it. Then she says it was about my friend and some weird ghost thing.

“The hell?”

Awesome Monday?!?!?!?

Guess what just happened! I just got a full scholarship to Florida A&M! WTF? On a Monday? Now I don't have anything to talk about that grinds my gears. That really made my day. Oh well. Sorry for the boring post, but I couldn't help it.

Dr. Orange

...Mondays...

Guess what I forgot about... daylight savings time! I got up an hour early today, unbeknownst to me, all ready to go to school. On my way out I see my mom. If our conversation was on aim:

me: See u mom

mom: ...where r u goin?

me: ...?

me: to school?

mom: u forgot to set your clock back didnt u?

me: wait...

me: so its 8:00 already?

mom: ...no...

mom: its 6:00...

me: oh...

me: damn

mom: what was that?

me: nothing, im goin back to sleep

Guess what? I couldn't go to sleep. And all just in time for monday, right? So there's your geargrinder for today.

Dr. Orange

Wet blankets and things that go BOO!

..... and yet again it is Halloween time. Don't get me wrong its a great time and all, seeing all those "costumes" (aka great excuses for everyone to show of their nature given treasures) but yea its been an interesting weekend. Went camping with my girlfriend after school Friday, that was fun, got completely soaked from the rain before we even got in the tent. Then we saw the error of our tent costructing ways and had to fix the damn thing in the rain so we didnt drown in the middle of the night, the rest of the night can be imagined by your good imagination except for the paranoia ensued by the random strangers walking around with flash lights and a strange minivan driving around the place, needless to say, she was paranoid and i think slightly terrified for the rest of the night. The cold and the moistness of the blankets and everything really contributed to some shitty sleep, general synopsis of that, the women folk still confuse the shit out of me. Most of saturday was pretty shitty i was tired as shit, i was sore as shit, and i had to ride around with my family buying shit so we didnt starve ... but i had my dinosaur jacket on so i was fucking awesome, people kept staring and giving me weird looks, needless to say I will be wearing that jackets soooo often now, until it gets unbearably cold for it, if it does. that brind me to saturday night, didnt really want to go party with a bunch of total strangers and my mother so i decided to go visit the pretty lady i decided to camp with the night prior. We started watching Dead Silence but she couldnt pass through even 40 minutes and we ended up watching The Ninth Gate, pretty good Depp movie, but not before i legitimately scared her and made her scream so the whole house could hear, that was fun. Ended up passing out on her couch, which apparently smells like me now. next morning was pretty uneventful, she had to play for church, i had a good debate whether to go or not but i didnt think i could go to church in the state i was in, so i went hope and proceded with my usual sunday Tea-Fest, the amounts of hot tea i consume on sundays is pretty staggering, anywas yea which bring me basically to now, sitting here chilling with a shitty headache, time to get some sleep, or stare at my lava lamp until my eyes are too tired to stay open.

On a separate note, my recent introduction to dubstep has pretty much exploded to become my new music phase which kind of makes sense to make a transition from ambient and psytrance, maybe i need to find some DnB next, but yea some great rap dubstep remixes out there, makes rap actually bearable to listen to even if only for the amazingly catchy beats ... thats all

I was gonna put a quote here but for some reason they all suck to me right now so yea

The Russian


Also theres a pic of my costume above, the indifferent dinosaur, he might eat you he might not, even he doesnt know

With Great Power Comes Shut the Fuck Up ... Part 1

This week isn't a continuation of the story, but don't worry, the Halloween chapter will come by Thursday, I have a few other projects this week so it might be delayed, but it is coming. This is my new story I'm working on, completely fiction. Yay. Ghosts and superheroes. What're you gonna do
? Ha...


The club was packed. Too many people if you ask me. Oh well, it was fun. It was an opening. Thank god I got on the VIP list. I know the DJ, he's cool. He has a future in this. I actually helped a lot in opening his club, it was to help my business plans along as well. He does a lot of musical work for me while I do a lot of advertising for him.

One of the gimmicks I wanted him to carry through with was to have a new mask every night that he DJ'd at the club. We were working on designs for a few masks to go with the theme nights and such, I would suggest an idea for him to draw (he also kicks ass at art) and he would design, then we would tweak and I would have it made.

We're both huge comic fans. Zach was chilling up at his turntables. I was walking out of the VIP rooms, and onto the main floor. Someone spilt beer on me as they bounced by. I saw Alex near the front shouting something up at Zach. I made my way towards the front.

Jesus fucking christ. The next morning I was hung over. I met up with Alex and Zach for coffee right before school, Zach was the only one not hung over, but thats just because he was performing.

We walked into our first class, which happened to be English. Seeing as how this was halloween week, she was going to tell us ghost stories from England.

This one, the story of 50 Berkeley Square. Holy shit. It is a certain room that scared everyone from staying in it. Everyone who did, ended up seriously disabled, or dead. This story perked me up from my headache. Completely distracted me. I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"I have a plan," I started off to Alex and Zach.

"Oh god, what is it?" Alex was still in pain, I could see him squinting through his sunglasses.

"We're going to England."

"For what?" asked Zach.

"Well, that ghost. We are going to stay in that mansion. We will each stay in a different room, and have only three things, a camera, pencils and a notepad."

"And.... why would we do that?"

"We are going to get artistic influence or dead. We will record all the stuff that happens with the camera set up in the corner of each room, and record any ideas we have for stories or cool things to do on the notepads. I will stay in the main haunted room, you two will stay on either side of it so that if any of us needs help, we won't be too far away."

"Okay... this sounds like a bad idea." Alex wasn't too thrilled at the time.

"I already made the arrangements. Pack your bags, we leave next week."


They weren't too enthusiastic until we actually got to Berkeley Square, the air there, it was different. We got inside, and I talked to the antiquarian book dealers that now resided there, we moved our bags up to our rooms, pulled out some ale we'd bought on the way and started drinking. We started out in the main haunted room. The room people have died in because of this black misty ghost, and I was intent on seeing it.

Zach and Alex went to their rooms at 11:30 p.m. I sat there drinking my last cup, and getting into bed.

It took me ten minutes to actually get to sleep, then about twenty minutes later, right at midnight, the alarm on my phone went off. I hadn't set my alarm. I thought Alex must have done that to play a prank on me. Well, my heart rate was slightly elevated, I just tucked my head under the covers and tried to go back to sleep.

I heard the door open.

"What? I'm trying to sleep."

There was no response.

"Come on guys, this isn't funny, I really want to sleep."

Still nothing.

"Oh my god! STOP IT, I'M NOT SCARED" I started yelling.

When they didn't say anything, I looked over the covers and saw the door open, with a massive amount of black mist floating, blocking most of the light from the hallway.

Oh shit. He's real.

He formed into a man. A man that looked, well, scary. He looked like he stepped out of a 1920's gangster film. He was wearing a long black pinstripe zoot suit. He had a red shirt, and a black tie. He was leaning on a cane, and a black fedora was resting at a slant on his head. His eyes were fire red. He stood and stared with a stone cold expression.

I stood up. God damn I'm stupid. I walked up to about a foot away from him, then stared into his eyes. He smiled. Then everything went black.

I felt disturbed. I was in deep sleep. Deep deep sleep. There was still a nagging, a pulling on me, i felt someone tugging at my arms. I woke up and my eyes flashed open, a black mist reached out from my arms and grabbed Alex and Zach, who looked worried and in shock at the same time. All in one fail swoop, I concentrated on letting them go, and all of a sudden, they fell to the ground and the mist was going back into my arms.

"What the fuck was that?" Zach was panting.

"I... I don't know..." I lied. I did know. I didn't understand, but I knew.

Yes, you know. I am a part of you now. you and I are one. I am your faithful servant. I will carry out all of your wishes. My powers are almost limitless, and you have the full range of them. The voice of the apparition bounded around the room, coming from me. I looked in the mirror and saw that one of my eyes was red, the other was its natural color.

"Wow, does this mean you can fly?" Zach was still having a hard time with this. Alex was sitting in the corner with a thoughtful look on his face.

"I guess." I tried to fly, and it happened, I floated up in the air then came back down.

I then concentrated really hard. The mist sprang from my body, then collected around me in a cloud. Then it settled I was in a jet black suit, with added muscles and two slits for eyes. My eyes were glowing red, my body was sleek and aerodynamic.

"So... uh, what's your name?" Alex asked, "if you have a costume you have to have a name to go with it."

'i don't know yet.....this is really strange...."

How about.....