Hell Part 76

"God dammit." Ramsey said.

"Top," I started.

"Don't do it," he cut me off. 

"Okay, look, how about we go see God, he is who wants us to do this anyway."

"He wants you to do it," Zac said.

"No, he specified us four."

"Where's Alex?"

"We don't know yet. Come on, lets go talk to God."

Zach and Ramsey looked at me kind of funny, then I made a portal and hopped through it. I landed in Heaven. I hadn't been through here yet. It was nice though, paradise indeed. Ramsey and Zac popped through soon after me. We walked up to the gate where an angel told us we needed to keep our presence hidden. He guided us to a palace and then into a room where God was sitting. 

"Stewart, what the hell are you doing in here?" God asked.

"Ha, thats funny, I rule hell, so, yeah...nevermind, but they wanted confirmation on this whole plan. Well that and Zac needs a place on earth to stay where I can get hold of him, can you get that arranged and take care of him real quick, explain it all, you know, the highlights or whatever, I need to run and find Alex after I check up on the homefront."

I didn't really wait for an answer, I was doing this for God, he could do something to help me out. Who knew Zac would have gotten so stubborn. I grabbed Ramsey's arm and we ran out of the palace, meeting the same angel from before.

Hey buddy, you ran off in a hurry there earlier, whats up with you? How have you been?

"You know him Ser?" I asked.

He's Gabriel, he helped me out a lot before I got imprisoned.

"Hey, Ser it is great to see you, but we are having some heavenly problems. I will come visit you in Hell when you have gathered the last horseman," Gabriel said. He seemed concerned, but we were in kind of a hurry. We got to the gates and I opened up a portal and Ramsey and I went back to hell. 

"Did you have to encourage him like that?" I asked.

"Well, if I had been all on your side he wouldn't have gone for it."

"True."

Grief walked up just about then and said "Sir, I have located your other friend. He is in a very peculiar place. Shall I take you to him?"

"Sure, thanks Grief."

"He is frighteningly good at his job," Ramsey whispered in my ear. I chuckled a little bit as Grief opened a portal. We jumped through and came out on the other end facing Alex and an old man. 

"Grief! How good to see you again!" The old man said.

"Grief?" Alex asked.

"Again?" I asked.

"Good?" Ramsey asked.

"Ah good friend, they are here and we shall be off," Greif was grinning. 

"What the hell man, you've been coming down here and talking to him, for how long?" I asked Grief.

"Well, ever since we had one body," replied the old man. 

"What?" Ramsey said. 

"It can wait," I said.

"Wait, so you were in cahoots with a general from Hell this whole time, that's how you knew my friends were coming?" Alex turned to the old man. 

"You have cahoots?" I asked Grief.

"None of this is terribly important, just relax and lets all go back to Hell to talk it over," the old man said.

Grief and the old man jumped through the portal first, laughing with each other, leaving me, Ramsey and Alex standing in front of a huge portal, jaws open, and not being able to say anything.

"So where are we anyway?" Ramsey asked.

"Underwater," Alex responded.

"What?" 

Alex grinned.

We jumped through into Hell, to find Gabriel, an angry looking Zach, Valentine, Grief, Mary, the old man, and God sitting at the table. 

"This is the strangest group of people I've ever seen in my life. Hey, how did she get here?" I asked.

"I went and got her," Zac was scowling.

"Fine, go and get her."

"I already did." 

I took my seat next to Mary and Grief, Alex on the other side of the old man who was on the other side of Grief was sitting next to Ramsey and then God.

"Okay, I'm pressed for time," God started, "Look, Stewart, Alex, Ramsey, Zach, you four are the new horsemen of the apocalypse. Death, War, Famine and Pestilence. Good? Good. We are not quite ready for the impending doom, but the four of you need to learn how to function as a team." Zach scowled more as God continued, "We will have a few prep excersises and a few different challenges that I'm sure you will enjoy sent through Gabriel. So, I need to go, but Gabriel will stay with Zach on earth tonight, but until then, eat and enjoy. Goodbye." 

With the final word he vanished. That was really fucking cool. 

It was awkward at the table at first, everyone ate quietly. Then the old man and Grief started telling us stories about their past adventures and what they used to do, Gabriel and Grief are apparently good friends as well, as are Gabriel and the old man.

"I feel left out," Ramsey mouthed to me from across the table. Shortly after though, everyone was telling stories and joking around about things. No one felt any tension anymore. No one was stressed or upset. 

After a few rounds of stories Zac decided to leave. Gabriel opened a portal for Zac and Valentina. He said he would follow them later. 

The old man and Alex went into their room, Ramsey to his, leaving me, Grief, Gabriel, and Mary in the room. 

"Go on to bed Mary, I'll be in there in a minute," I told her.

"Okay," she said.

"Grief," I started, grabbing his arm before he could go into the hall, "I don't know how it really works down here, and I don't know what the protocol is or anything, but.."

"Yes, my lord?" 

"Take a vacation dude. You work really fucking hard, and you're good at your job. Seriously take a week."

"Thank you my lord."

"After that, could you find out how Hades is going?"

"Yes my lord."

"Okay, try and see the world some, it may not be around much longer to see. If you want, just have fun, kick back, do whatever. Do not feel obligated to do anything for us for a week or so. Is that cool? I can tell you to do that right?"

"Yes my lord," Grief said laughing a little bit, "it is much appreciated, Satan never let us have vacations. I'd say Hell is running a hell of a lot better now than it was."

"Thanks Grief, a lot of it is because of you. I haven't done much with it. Lot of Hell jokes today, where is a good Heaven joke?"

"Sir, you have done more than you know," with this he smiled and walked away. I turned to Gabriel.

What is troubling you friend?

"Well, there are problems in Heaven," he replied.

What do you mean? A coo? A rebellion? Corrupt people doing bad things?

"I'm afraid it is something like that. We don't know the specifics. Hades was just the first of many. Whoever is leading all this got Hades and the original four horsemen and God knows who else."

"Who then?" I asked.

"Who what?"

"Who, if God knows..."

"Its a saying."

"Ah, there's a Heaven joke."

"Anyway, we don't know who else is involved or what exactly they are planning. You need to be more careful. You should know better than to try to take on all four horsemen at the same time. If I hadn't stepped in with Death you would have been killed and we would have been fucked."

He didn't die via masturbation?

"No."

"Damn."

Gabriel told us what he could, then he left. After he left I went into the throne room and sat down in my chair. I looked out at the court, all the stuff that Mary and Grief have done. I walked out past the court and out onto the balcony. I looked out over Hell. It wasn't so bad. 

"Stewart..." Mary wrapped her arms around my stomach. I knew things would be alright. 

"I love you." I told her.

She kissed my shoulder and squeezed tighter.